


Bittersweet Beginnings

by kiranwrites



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Crushes, F/M, Fire Nation politics, Food as a Metaphor for Love, Gen, Hallucinations, M/M, One Year Later, Other, PTSD, Politics, Post War, Zuko is an Awkward Turtleduck, after the war, mental health
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:54:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27604508
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kiranwrites/pseuds/kiranwrites
Summary: After the war ended, the Gaang (and Mai and Ty Lee and Azula) was in a position few found themselves in - leading a broken world while trying to heal and adjust to a world without the constant conflict they'd always known.
Relationships: Aang/Katara (Avatar), Sokka/Zuko (Avatar)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 20





	1. Where were we?

Soon after the war ended, the children that ended it were thrust into leading a world that wanted and needed so badly to heal from 100 years of conflict. For them, it was a hard balance to find. 

Sokka and Katara lost their mother’s life and their father’s mind to the Fire Nation. All through the rest of their childhood and even through the war, Sokka let Katara’s pain take the front stage. He let her go on that mission with Zuko to avenge their mother. He knew what she meant to her and he let her have all the time she needed and never let himself be vulnerable in front of her. Sokka knew, instinctually, that he should talk to her about the guilt eating away at him – that he let her get taken away, though he was a little boy. He still missed her warm soup and even warmer hugs, more than he ever let on. 

After she died, Katara took over as the mother of the tribe’s children. She was only seven when her mom was stolen from her, but she knew that that pain was not unique to her. She wanted no one else to suffer the same she did, so she pushed all her grief into caring for her brother and the other children in the tribe. When she had a moment to calm down after Ozai’s defeat, there was a sudden emptiness in her life. Yes, Katara had found the man that killed her mother. But after Ozai, it just seemed a lot more permanent maybe due to the more visible reminders in her life. Perhaps it was because their dad now had a limp and sometimes stared too long and too vacantly out into the sea while fishing, or how Sokka’s usually sure hands sometimes shook when holding his boomerang. And then there was Aang. 

Aang lost his entire culture to firebenders when he was twelve. Four years and three elements’ mastery later he finally felt the loss of his father and mentor, Monk Gyatso, in full force. Sometimes he would turn to his right after setting up a tower that Sokka was sure to knock over expecting to see the Monk’s smiling face and seeing nothing but the vast snowy expanse of the South Pole. When he visited Zuko in the Fire Nation, he sometimes saw remnants of his friends in Ty Lee and wondered if he knew some of her lineage. All around him, Aang saw ghosts of his people and a world that had healed and left him behind a hundred years. He was almost afraid to go back to his home. 

Similarly, Zuko had a choice ahead of him. For the last seven years of his life, he had spent his time on the road, chasing down the Avatar, and later, working with him to overthrow his father. With the Fire Lord in prison and his sister out there, he wasn’t sure where he stood in this new world. Yes, he was the crown prince of the nation, but he wasn’t sure he was ready to take on such responsibility after years of not knowing his nation. There was also the matter of his sister. 

Azula hadn't been heard from for over a year, and the last time Zuko saw her was before teaching the Avatar firebending. He occasionally wondered what it would be like in a world where their father wasn’t a bloodthirsty colonizer. Would they have gotten along? Zuko hoped. Of all his family, Uncle Iroh was the only one he still spoke too, but he had spent many years with him exclusively. Zuko wanted someone other than him to talk to, someone from his age group from the same nation of him, who knew what it was like to have a father so homicidal. 

The post-war struggle of the three nations and Aang were reflected in its leaders, from uniting a grieving nation after stealing so many of its children for war, to a nation that lost more than half of its benders and most of its men to some generals’ thirst for blood, to a country so brainwashed that it forgot the war that plagued it.


	2. How It Began

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zuko, Sokka, and Toph go shopping while ghosts begin to haunt Aang. Azula's world as she knew it ended and she wants it back.

It was a bright and sunny day, and everyone was once again together. A year after the war ended, and it was the first time the whole “Gaang,” as Sokka called them, was together again. 

Zuko wasn’t sure how he found himself in the market holding all Sokka and Toph’s bags, wasn’t sure how he agreed to let a blushing Aang and Katara hang around the palace, but he was glad at this little pretense at normalcy before getting back there. 

Sokka had given Aang and Katara the side-eye before leaving, and Toph wiggled her eyebrows at them. Evidently something had gone on between the three, but Zuko wasn’t sure if he wanted to ask, no matter how isolated from his friends he felt. His life over the past year had begun taking a toll on him, and he wondered if he should take up his uncle’s offer to run the nation for a while in his stead. At least that way he wouldn’t wake up most nights with a burning sensation on his face, or a feeling of his mother’s hands on his back, or Azula’s childish giggling ringing in his years. 

“Hey, this looks kind of like those creepy portraits outside your bedroom,” Sokka exclaimed. 

It's not that he hated the palace – it was quite the opposite, at least that’s what he told himself these days. “What portraits?” He asked, like a liar. 

“Come on, Zuko – I can’t see and they’re enough to give me the creeps.” Toph said and walked over with yet another set of bags. 

“Are you done?” Zuko asked. He hoped they weren’t planning on shopping till the stalls were empty. 

“Your nation rampaged pretty much everything from my tribe, I think you can handle a few more items, don’t you think?” 

That wasn’t something Zuko could dispute. Sighing, Zuko followed his two over-enthusiastic friends to the next stall. 

“Do you think I can pull off this look?” Sokka asked, sporting what looked like a rather hideous version of the Blue Spirit’s mask. 

“Yeah!” exclaimed Toph. 

Sokka grinned. “Why, thank –” his face fell “why do you feel the need to do that?” 

“Listen, we still haven’t gone to buy soaps, and that’s what I came here for!” exclaimed Toph. 

“Why do you need soap anyway?” Zuko asked. “Don’t you just... bend the dirt off yourself?” 

Toph shrugged. “It’s good to pamper myself sometimes.” 

Sokka rolled his eyes. “The soaps are for Katara, aren’t they?” 

“Hey –” Zuko said suddenly, as Sokka piled that mask on top of the pile of junk they’d bought. “Listen.” 

The trio rushed toward the center of the marketplace, where there were a group of dancers performed to some drums. It sounded like Zuko’s firebending, sudden and smooth and exciting, like life. 

All around the square was lit with lanterns that looked at least a hundred years old, if not more. The patterns on them only added to the performance, making it seem as though the shadows were part of the whole ordeal. 

“Hey,” Sokka said. “You ok?” 

“Yeah. I’d only ever heard about this dance in school. I never dreamed that I’d see it myself.” 

Toph moved closer to them. “Zuko, the Fire Nation’s changing. Yeah, these dancers are a bit rusty, but things are changing.” 

Zuko saw the lights around him and took a deep breath in. He was going to be fine. 

– – – 

“It’s so weird to walk around the palace and not sneak around,” said Katara. 

“Yeah,” said Aang. “When I was growing up my friend Kuzon and I used to run around this place. It was less...” 

“Murder-y?” 

“I was going to say dark, but yeah.” 

They walked a few paces in comfortable silence. It was weird walking these halls without having guards run at them. 

Suddenly, Katara was pulled into a room, the door locked securely behind her. The room was minimalist for the Fire Nation, with a bed, a window, and a washbasin. Of course, it was all covered in red – overall stark contrast from the soft blues and whites of the Southern Water Tribe. 

“Hey,” Aang said. 

“Hey, yourself,” she giggled. 

He pushed her deeper against the locked door, staring into her eyes as though he was looking into the depths of the ocean. Ever so slowly, he moved her hair out of the way and stared deep into her blue eyes. 

“What’re you doing?” she asked him, much too quietly. 

“Enjoying the view,” he whispered, inching his face closer. 

A breeze through the open window ruffled his robes, and he paused. Pushed her aside, opened the door, and strode out. 

“Aang?” she asked, running after him towards one of the large windows. “What’s going on?” 

“I’m fine, Katara.” With that, he flew off over 

– – – 

Azula staggered into a village off the coast of... she wasn’t sure. Ever since Zuko and that water tribe peasant beat her outside her childhood home, she hadn’t quite felt in control of herself. She could feel herself slipping away. And then she heard the news that Father was now in prison and lost his bending. If little Zuzu and his little friends did that to such a powerful figure, what would they do to her? What would she do to her, if she found her? 

There was a little group of peasants laughing amongst each other, no doubt at her, a royal that was reduced to a laughingstock. It would be so easy for her to march there, assert her authority over them. They would stop laughing. From her spot behind the tree, it would be so easy to punish them for treason to her nation, for treason to her – 

The air around her grew electrified and she was aware of her huffing and puffing, and she was so tired, her arms felt heavier than they ever had, and she pushed some fire out but there was nothing but smoke. 

She was falling, but she knew she owed it to herself and her nation to move, to be strong, to show these peasants who was in charge. She could see them out in front of her, all blurred bodies and too mocking laughter, her future subjects in this village she didn’t know where, and the world went dark.


	3. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Suki, Aang, and Zuko ponder on their position in the post-war world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning - there’s a lot of homesickness in this one, specifically where Suki and Aang are discussed. This chapter also introduces some of the things that Suki, Aang, Sokka, and Zuko will deal with throughout the rest of the fanfic, so just be warned.  
> As always, comments are very much appreciated!

Crisp air in her lungs, regular clothes ruffling in the slight wind, Suki sighed. “It’s good to be back,” she said to no one in particular.

She was alone in the Kyoshi Warriors’ training house. Everyone else was around the world, claiming they wanted a bit of fresh air. Suki, personally, had had enough fresh air. The crisp Kyoshi Island air was enough for her, right? It was her home, and these were the people she served. 

Sighing, she went to put on her uniform, deciding to run through some forms. It was just routine, to keep her muscles in working order when she was needed again. White foundation, red paint, black paint.

Stepping out, Suki looked at the motto above the door. Rise like dust, transform like earth. She considered it for a moment – she knew a thing or two about rising. Rising above, to the challenge, always. No matter what, rise to the occasion and you will receive.

She went through the motions. Breathe in, fan out, shift weight back, breathe out, thrust, move, repeat. It was almost relaxing to stretch properly again and she nearly forgot about why she was here in the first place.

Earlier that month she’d cleaned her whole house, and then her neighbors’, done their groceries, made their children clothes. At first, they’d all accepted her help because they’d needed it, but after a while they decided Suki was a bit much, especially since at times she was overbearing. But no matter, because she was still at home here. At service, always.

The war was supposed to bring her peace, and yet. There was something missing from her life. She had gotten everything she’d ever dreamed about the last few months – a chance to travel, to learn about the world and herself, and found family. And yet.

She was back, and she realized that home was a lonely place.

– – –

He knew he shouldn't have left Katara like that in the window, but he felt something in the breeze, something that made him feel gross all of a sudden. He was out of balance with something.

Rather than join Sokka like he’d originally planned, he decided to go to a smaller Air Temple outside the city, one Zuko told him was relatively untouched.

Stepping into the temple and hoping to clear his head, Aang heard the voice again.

"Who are you?" He asked.

No response. Just a trick of the wind, he thought. Though Monk Gyatso often said that air guides us when we are lost, a light in the dark, a glider in a storm, so to speak. “Air is everything,” he used to say.

For a second he considered losing himself in the moment, the cold floor comforting against his feet, almost grounding. He chuckled at the irony of it. Grounding, for an Air Nomad. If anything, it was comforting.

So, he sat on the floor and closed his eyes, letting himself go for a moment. Avatar duties aside, just a boy meditating. He could almost hear his friends’ laughter drifting toward him from the airball court, inviting him to a game. Just like old times. At some point he slipped into the Spirit World and it was fully welcome. The lush greenery stretched on for ages and when he took a breath, he felt the cool air move through him, and it felt a little like coming back to a place he was no longer sure was his.

He closed his eyes and he felt himself move somewhere else, this time a place more familiar. He thought he heard Monk Gyatso, but that wasn’t possible. A small village, a green field, and stones in his stomach. With a start, he realized he was home. Or the Spirit World version of home. Home was long gone.

But then he saw one of his moms step out, head thrown back in laughter at something Gyatso had said and stepped forward against his will. He decided he wanted to leave; he wasn’t ready to see her again, not yet. He tried running away but saw he was stuck in mud and no matter how hard he tried to leave, he couldn’t.

She walked toward him, looking just as she did before a giggling fit tea with Gyatso’s and her wife undoubtedly caused, and when he reached out to her, she vanished into thin air, a memory, smoke in a breeze.

– – –

Sokka took a moment to arrange himself when he saw Zuko’s sorry state of being. He didn’t want to disturb him too bad, after all the night air was cool and he wasn’t quite sure how that affected firebenders who used to be bad and were now good. Zuko worked so hard, and it showed in his tired frame. If anything, it was one of his most admirable qualities – that he never gave up. As such, Sokka knew he deserved the best. He decided to go with the most sensitive and caring thing he could muster.

“Taking a break from being Jerk Lord, then?” he said and grimaced internally.

Zuko jumped. “Are you always this sneaky?”

Zuko felt Sokka’s stare on him. He knew what Sokka saw – mussed hair, blanket sloppily thrown over the window as a makeshift curtain, face redder than usual, tired eyes, someone who had let go for far too long.

“Come on, I made you some tea,” Sokka said and thrust a cup toward him. Zuko wasn’t sure where the cup came from.

Not waiting for an invite, Sokka plopped himself down on his bed. “You didn’t answer my question,” he reminded.

Zuko sighed, voice raspy. “Must I?”

Sokka's face softened. “Listen. I know Toph went back home to start her metalbending academy, and Katara and I are going back this weekend. I think Aang’s coming too, but if I have to hear one more bit of sweetie come out of my sister’s mouth, I swear I will not be held responsible for what I do.”

Zuko stared. “Sokka, I’m fine.”

“No way. Do you want me to get Doctor Wang Fire?”

Zuko wasn’t sure he wanted to know, but he braved it anyway. “Who’s Wang Fire?”

“Wait one second,” he said, running out the door.

Zuko sat his tea down and laid on the bed again. Sokka was noisy and took up a lot of space, and he wasn’t sure he could handle that.

A moment later, his door burst open with Sokka but in a beard and a middle-class Fire City outfit.

“What –”

“Now why are you sulking, Jerk Lord?” Sokka asked in a weird voice.

“Sokka, I don’t have time for this.”

“Sokka? Who's Sokka? I’m Doctor Wang Fire.”

“God, you’re really -”

“Listen, young man. You'd best tell me what’s going on right now or else I’ll call up the principal.”

“I don’t even go to school,” he deadpanned.

Sokka gave him a look.

Zuko sighed. “For a little while, at least. I'm worried about being a bad leader.”

Now that it was out in the open, Zuko could almost feel the shift in Sokka. Worry, or worse yet, pity.

“Oh, come on, what’re you so worried about? It's not like there’s people waiting for you to fail so they can go back to conquering everyting again.”

Zuko stared.

“Okay, maybe there are. But I really thought you wanted to do this.”

“Sokka, I did. I do. But things have changed.”

Sokka took a long sip of his tea, evidently waiting for Zuko to continue.

“It’s like... when you’re about fifteen, you’d start training to be Fire Lord. I didn’t, because... you know.”

“Because you were too busy chasing us around the globe?”

“Something like it. I know all about the world, but not nearly enough about my own nation. How can I lead after being away for so long?”

Sokka was silent.

“I know Toph has her metalbending academy and that she left right after we went shopping and Aang and Katara and I are heading off to help out our home, but –”

“It’s not you and you know it!” Zuko stood up suddenly, almost knocking the tea out of his cup. “Uncle’s been taking care of the empire for the past couple years while I... do whatever it is that people much younger than me do, and he wants to do it, he’s a natural born leader, but...”

“But what?” Sokka asked softly.

“I don’t know. He wants me to take over again, and I can’t. I see all of you doing all these amazing things, and even though Toph left just earlier this afternoon, I feel very left out.” He paused. “I don’t know if this is where I belong.”

Sokka took off his disguise and just sat near him. He desperately wished his sister were here, she always knew what to say in moments like these. He needed hope to share but he didn’t know how. So, he did what he did best – make Zuko comfortable and stand guard outside his room.


	4. Family, Familiarity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aang, Sokka, and Katara head to the Southern Water Tribe. Azula wakes up and sees a familiar face. Mai and Ty Lee discuss their lives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m very excited about Azula and Aang’s arc in this. There’s some Mai and Ty Lee development I’m also planning that I’m looking forward to writing. As always, and comments are appreciated!  
> Warnings: Azula’s hallucination, past abuse implied. Chosen vs birth family discussion, especially the guilt surrounding Ty Lee’s choice.

Katara sat all alone inside the airship at a window overlooking the tons of families that had made their homes on servicing the airship port. It was two days after she had last seen Aang after their time at the Fire Palace, his lips at her throat when he'd left without warning. 

She saw Aang and Appa in the distance and stood. It wasn’t yet time to leave, maybe she’d have time to talk to him before then. She smoothed over her dress and walked toward the door, just in time to see Appa land. 

Aang jumped off his head and patted his head. 

Katara was close enough to put her hand on his shoulder, so she reached out, but decided against it. “Aang?” she said. 

Aang turned and it was almost like he didn’t see her at all. “Hey, Katara,” his voice was hoarse as though he hadn’t said anything in a while. 

“You left me at the palace.” She was surprised at how steady her voice was. 

He looked down. “I know. I just... I thought I heard something.” 

“So you left me there?” she asked, voice rising. A tentative push. 

“I told you, Katara,” and now he seemed almost angry. “I thought I heard someone calling me, okay?” 

Surprised at his outburst, all she said was, “I...” 

He hesitated and reached out. “Did you pack your bags? I was hoping we could go on Appa instead of the airship. Like old times.” 

She afforded him a small smile. “Like old times.” 

Aang helped her get her things on top of his bison and from her leverage point ten feet high she saw her brother approach, his arms weighed down by everything he’d bought at the festival. 

She noticed Aang’s face of relief as he flew off to help him. At least they were heading back to the Southern Water Tribe, back to a place familiar to her. The two weeks in the Fire Nation, while enjoyable, had been too long. It wasn't where she was happy. 

Sokka whooped as he climbed on, his look of joy so contagious that she couldn't help but grin back at him as he climbed into the basket. “You ready?” he asked her, eyes shining with something she found far too contagious. 

“Oh, yeah. Let's go home,” she said, unable to keep the excitement out any longer. 

Aang turned his head toward the front, but not before she saw his near-permanent smile fall. “Yip yip,” and it was a whisper almost desperate. 

– – – 

She didn’t recognize the house she woke up in, but the smell of dirt in the air was unmistakable. Father stood by her bed, looking down at her, bending so low that his beard almost grazed her blanket. 

She saw him lift his hand to her face, almost tenderly. “Azula.” He said quietly. 

Her eyes closed again, and she was back home, Father yelling about how she didn’t push hard enough in the last bit of her forms. She grinned at the memory, at the reminder that she was still the Fire Princess, that her duty to her people wasn’t over yet. 

She stepped forward and immediately fell face-first onto the floor, the dirt coating her arms now. She was disoriented for a moment but quickly took in her surroundings, unsure of where she was and how she got there. A door, footsteps. Peasants, by the sound of it. 

She wasn’t yet sure what they were doing in the palace, so she hid under the covers of a bed she saw in the room. 

“I thought I heard her walking around,” she heard a wife say. 

“It’s alright, Kyo.” A deeper voice this time. Azula shifted to listen closer. “She looked really tired, and we ought to give her time.” 

“Hashi, she’s been asleep for two days now.” Two days? That seemed a bit much for exhaustion. 

“I heard her talking in her sleep last night, it sounded like she was talking to her dad.” 

Hashi sighed. “Kyo, you really need to rest. You work too hard.” He opened the door. “And look, she’s asleep again. No point in waking her.” 

Kyo sighed and walked away, Hashi not far behind her. 

“Weak,” a voice behind her said. 

Azula stood, legs shaky, but beyond her father’s view. “Father, I –” 

“No matter,” he said, raising his hand and walking toward her through the bed. Then his face contorted, and he raised his hand high toward the sun. “It is, of course, fitting for a Fire Princess to cower before her subjects.” 

“Father, I know what I’m doing, I promise.” Azula smoothed her face. It had always benefited her to stay in control, or at least give Ozai the impression that she was. 

“Do you?” 

She stood up straight and felt warm all over again, in control. She knew what she was doing. She was the Fire Princess; she couldn’t not have a plan. “Yes.” 

– – – 

“I don’t really like that we’re back here,” said Mai. 

“Me neither,” Ty Lee said from atop the tree. 

They were back at Mai's parents' home and neither of them had realized how hard it was to be back. 

“You know...” Mai began. “My father told me yesterday that I should smile more.” 

“But you’re already so pretty,” Ty Lee said, reaching down to touch Mai's face. 

Mai brushed her hand away. “He said it’s because he wants me to be a proper lady.” 

Ty Lee sat up and looked to the sky and then, with a spark in her eyes and fully serious, “We should run away together.” 

Mai shook her head. “It’s easy for you to say. You barely even talk to your parents.” 

Ty Lee paused. “I don’t like that.” 

Mai looked taken aback. “What do you mean? I thought you liked your... arrangement.” 

“I do, but I guess I just miss them.” 

“Your parents?” 

Ty Lee looked her straight in the eye. “I miss having a family.” 

Neither of them was sure to go from there. 

“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t like mine either.” Mai said quietly. 

“I know. I feel like I abandoned them, especially my sisters.” 

“You do know you don’t owe them anything?” 

“I guess I feel bad. Because they didn't want to stay there any more than I did.” 

Mai chuckled darkly. “Fat load of good that did them.” 

“They’re all part of a matched set,” Ty Lee continued. “Someone to complete their pair. When we decided to join the circus, we almost got caught, you know. They had us all tied and were hauling us back to our bedroom.” 

Mai looked up. “You never told me that.” 

“We somehow got out and –” Ty Lee shrugged – “I saw them glancing back to see where their other half was, but no one ever checked for me.” 

“How do you know?” 

“Because,” Ty Lee sighed. “Even at the circus, there was never a moment where they weren’t complete. I was always performing by themselves, and they always told me that their routine was complete.” She paused. “That they didn’t need me.” 

“It’s the same with my parents. They're always looking after Tom-Tom. Honestly, they’ve never needed me before and I was fine with it.” 

“But?” Ty Lee asked. 

“But they suddenly act as if I’m their top priority, as if I can get them something because of... whatever it is I had with Zuko.” 

“Bu the war’s over now. And Zuko isn’t even Fire Lord. So what’re they looking for?” 

Mai sighed. “I think they just want to use me and be done. No matter what, I'm still just their daughter, and it’s my job to bring honor to my family.” 

Ty Lee jumped off her spot on the tree and landed to face Mai. “Is that what you want?” 

Mai looked away. “I’m not sure.”


	5. The Start, and The End

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Katara and Aang break up due to differences in priorities, Azula goes and meets the people hosting her, Zuko has a revalation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s where Azula’s recovery arc starts! Also, I worked very hard on this chapter to make it as accurate as I could to psychosis as I understand it, with major help from people in a A:TLA server I am in. So, major thanks to them.
> 
> Jasmine, Hashi, and Kyo are a few of my OCs. Hashi and Kyo are siblings that take in Azula after the events of Chapter 1. They don’t know that she’s the Fire Princess or any kind of royalty. Jasmine, on the other hand, is Iroh’s wife that died before the events of this fanfic. She is the person that Azula trusted most while growing up, for many reasons that I will talk about soon.
> 
> As always, comments are appreciated!

It was a week after they were home, but Katara still got giddy when she woke up and wasn't warm. That, coupled with the fact that there were a couple of igloos around again, truly helped ground her in the fact that there was peace now. Relatively speaking.

She stretched and put on her clothes for the day, glad that Gran Gran's new igloo was warmer than the small tent from before. Katara walked over to poke Sokka and briefly considered bending the igloo down to wake him up. He had snored far too loud all night. Or rather, the echoing of the igloo made her hear his snoring too loud.

Be that as it may, her shuffling woke him up and he moaned in protest. “Do we have to wake up so early?”

Katara rolled her eyes. “Come on, we’re going fishing.”

Sokka stretched. “But no magic water.”

Katara smiled. “No magic water.”

There ended up being magic water. Sokka was terrible at catching fish, and Katara had a date, or rather, a meeting time, with Aang she didn’t want to miss. They were supposed to go penguin sledding together.

“Aha!” Sokka cheered. “I’m a fishing genius!”

Katara rolled her eyes.

“Katara, you wouldn’t believe how many fish I caught today!” And she was five again, watching the excitement in his eyes. He flicked some water at her, and the moment was gone.

“What was that for?” she asked, bending the water off her now-cold face.

“For bending the fish toward me.”

“Oh. Well, looks like you needed help,” she said, but it came out far softer than she intended.

He smiled gently. “It’s fine. After all, if you are to play with magic water, it may well be to my advantage, right?”

She smiled.

He chuckled. “It’s much better than when you accidently froze me in Gran Gran’s soup.”

Katara laughed indagnantly. “That was one time!”

– – –

Aang hugged his knees closer, staring out at the unforgiving ice, the sun just hanging around the horizon as it tended to do this time of year. Penguins mulled all around him, their backs in stark contrast to the icy white that enveloped the landscape around him.

He heard Katara walk toward him but didn’t turn around, mesmerized by the yellowish-orange color the sun tinted the snow.

“Seems almost yesterday we were back here, you asking me to go penguin sledding.”

“You still said yes,” he reminded her, smiling.

Katara held his hand in her mittened one. “That I did.”

They sat there peacefully, just watching the perpetual sunset. The penguin seals, unknowing of their troubles, mulled around feeding their children.

A chill rang through the ice mountain on which they sat, and Aang thought he recognized the voice. Turning with a start, he realized it was just another smoke trick. He opened his glider so as to chase after it, but Katara stopped him.

“Don’t leave,” she said.

He turned back and couldn’t say no. The voice faded.

“I wasn’t,” he lied. “Let’s go.”

Katara grinned and took his hand, and the two of them chased through the snowy plane together, grabbing onto different penguins and whooping down the hill.

They lay on their backs after, sweaty and content, but Aang could tell Katara was thinking about something. He didn't want this moment to end, so he didn't bring it up.

Katara shifted to sit up and then he did too, mainly missing the warmth that closeness provided. “We need to talk.”

His stomach flopped. “About what?”

“About...” she seemed to think for a moment. “Us.”

“Oh. What about us?”

Katara paused. “How are you, Aang? The truth this time. You've been a little distant lately.”

Aang flinched. “I’m - fine.”

Katara breathed in deep, and there was that voice again. “Then why did you run off that day? And then not show up? Aang, I don’t know what I would do if something had happened -”

And Aang realized his mistake. He reached toward her and she collapsed into him. “Hey. Hey. I just went to the Air Temple. To think a little, is all.”

They just sat there in silence, and there was that voice again. He thought he almost heard it call his name this time, in a tone far too familiar in a way he wasn’t willing to acknowledge just yet.

He jerked a little, and Katara withdrew and stared. “Aang?”

“I’m fine.”

Katara sighed. “See, Aang. There's that distance again. What's going on?”

“Nothing, ok? You wouldn’t understand.”

She raised an eyebrow. “I wouldn’t understand. What could I possibly not understand?”

“I don’t know. I hear something in the wind, some voice calling me. But I can’t seem to -”

She took in a shuddering breath, making up her mind. “We need a break,” she said. No going back now.

“What?”

“I can’t do this right now,” Katara said.

All of a sudden, the temperature dropped. “Why not?”

“Aang, you’re not letting me help you. I am here for you, and you’re closing yourself off. I can’t spend my time guessing what you’re going through - I need you to tell me that.”

“I -”

Katara stepped forward. “Aang. I care about you. But I think there are some things that you and I need to work through before we see each other like – like a couple again.”

Aang gulped, feeling a little dizzy. “You’re right.”

She leaned down and kissed his chapped lips softly. “I care about you. But we need some time, Aang. For our own good. I can’t be here unless you are here with me too.”

He looked down. “I know. I'm sorry.”

She smiled sadly. “It's alright. Maybe, once you and I are in a better place, we could... I don’t know... try again.”

“Yeah, maybe.”

She turned and began walking back to the village, and Aang was left all alone again.

– – – 

Azula woke to Aunt Jasmine shaking her awake. “You ready to wake up now, honey?”

Azula rubbed her eyes. “Auntie?” she said softly. “But I thought you were –”

Jasmine laughed and touched her head lightly. “As if I'd ever leave you alone.”

She couldn’t help but gape; Jasmine looked as regal as she did the last she saw her, and Azula, well. She knew she wasn’t as put together as she usually was. She raised a hand to smooth her hair down.

“Let’s get some food in you. The wonderful people here are cooking up something that smells far too good to be true.” Jasmine turned her attention to Azula. “Do you know them?”

Azula got up and stumbled a little, but Jasmine caught her. “Some peasants, I guess. No one important,” she shrugged.

Jasmine tsked. “There’s no such thing as –”

“As an unimportant person, I know.” Azula paused and walked slowly toward the door. “But they truly are very quaint. They didn’t even know who I was.”

Jasmine followed, the frown evident in her voice. “That’s what you think, Azula.”

She sighed as she walked down the claustrophobic hallway, Jasmine not far behind. “You’re right. That was an assumption I shouldn’t have made.”

Azula paused before entering the small kitchen. It was nothing much, and deserved even less description, because it was bare. Other than the two pots and pans and the few dishes and the table on the floor, there really wasn’t much to be said. It stank a little, but that was just whatever the woman was making.

Jasmine walked forward, almost through Azula, and she was breathless for a second. Jasmine bent down to smell the food and turned to the woman – Kyo? - and said, “This smell amazing.”

Kyo didn’t seem to notice her, and Azula was tempted to chide her for it, but she felt herself lean heavily enough on the wall to make it creak. This was an old house. Kyo looked up alarmed and rushed to loop an arm around her.

“Let’s get you seated,” she said.

Azula tried struggling away from her, but Jasmine shook her head no, so she stayed.

“Hashi?” The woman called, her voice far too loud for this small a house. “Hashi she’s out here now, we can eat.”

Hashi was a tired man, complete with eye bags. He looked like he hadn't slept in days. Or, if he had slept, it was fitful and light. “Oh. Hi,” he said. He didn’t sound how Azula thought he would. He walked over to the stove and brought that goop and some bowls over.

Azula stared haughtily at the still-bubbling soup.

Kyo began serving, and the banter between Hashi and Kyo began. It was clear that the two really liked each other.

But then Hashi said something and Kyo was quiet and staring carefully at Azula all of a sudden, and Azula touched her face, wondering if there was something on there.

“It’s tomato soup,” Hashi said. “I went to the market yesterday and found some nice and juicy ones, and figured you’d like them if you woke up.”

Kyo looked interested in her soup, stirring it round and round the bowl as though it were some sort of witchy concoction.

“Why don’t you have some?” Hashi asked nervously.

“Wait for them to eat it, Li,” Jasmine warned.

Azula nodded. “I think I’d like to see you eat this first,” she said carefully.

“But we made it for –”

Kyo elbowed him. “It’s alright, Hashi,” and then she lifted the bowl and started drinking it hungrily.

Hashi shrugged and lifted his as well. “So,” he said between slurps. “Where are you from?”

“I’m from –” Azula thought she saw Jasmine shaking her head, but she was translucent now so it was hard to tell. “Ba Sing Se.” Not a total lie.

Hashi raised an eyebrow. “We’re a way away from Ba Sing Se.”

“Hashi, you can’t just ask people why they were fainted in the woods.”

“But -”

Kyo set her bowl down with a start, and Azula watched for any swaying. To her surprise, there was none. But it had just been a minute, she knew sometimes these poisons took up to thirty minutes to begin their work. So, she watched Kyo and her soup. “Sorry about him,” she said. “He tends to be suspicious of anyone I bring home.”

“Oh. I see.” Azula said.

“But I'm sure you mean us no harm,” she added hastily.

The awkward pause seemed to stretch on.

Azula coughed lightly. “So, where are _you_ from? And what a lovely house you have here.”

Jasmine smiled and sat next to her, placing a steady hand on her arm. She was doing alright, Auntie wouldn't lie.

“Oh, we lived in Hiyafo, a small town outside of Ba Sing Se, but we moved here after our parents passed on.”

Hashi glared at her, but softened when he saw the look in her eye. “Yes. We thought, why not get away from the city air for a while? Partly because Kyo was still suffering from the mining accident, and partly because our house there was torn down.”

“You don’t seem too sad about that,” Azula noticed.

Jasmine held her a little tighter.

Kyo hesitated. A soft spot. “Our relationship with that town was... fraught.”

Hashi nodded. “Neither of us wanted a life partner, and that became clear the older we got. It wasn’t so much that they wanted us to have partners, it was that we were private. We didn’t advertise our lives to them, we kept to ourselves and ran our little fruit stand.”

Azula noted that information. “I see.”

Kyo chuckled. “But we’re so glad that the people here in Neyidu don’t mind that.” Kyo paused. “Anyway, enough about us. How are you now?”

Azula wasn’t sure. “Pretty well,” she lied.

Kyo smiled broadly and Hashi looked content, so Azula was glad they bought her lie. She didn’t want to tell them about Father, and given that they seemed to ignore Jasmine, she wasn’t sure she wanted to trust them either.

“Well,” Hashi said, getting up. He didn't seem to realize that his getting up caused the room to swirl around, a little like the soup Kyo had been stirring. “I need to go clean up a little, so I'll take your leave, uh...?”

“Are you alright, Li?” Jasmine asked suddenly, a whisper against the warped room.

“Li,” Azula replied, regaining her balance. She cleared her throat. “My name is Li.”

“Alright, Li,” Kyo said, following her brother. “I need to get going as well, but feel free to eat at your own pace. The pot of water should still be full, so feel free to get some if you need. We still have plenty of soup. Make yourself at home.” It was almost unnerving how bubbly she was.

It was about half an hour after the siblings had left the dining room, and the sky was finally getting dark. The overcast sky had cleared up a little, allowing a little of the setting sunlight into the small kitchen.

“Let’s get some more water,” Jasmine said to her. “The food looks good; both Hashi and Kyo are fine.”

Azula nodded, and leaned on Jasmine as she got up, the room still not fully solid. The two of them walked over to the window to throw out the glass of water, and filled their own. It was hard getting back to the table and sitting down without falling over, since it was so low.

Azula touched the bowl, smelling the soup.

“Heat it up a bit, just to kill of any residue.”

She nodded and held the bowl. She set it back down as soon as it started to steam. She looked to Jasmine, who smiled and nodded.

Azula lifted the bowl to her lips, and relished the thick, creamy soup. Hashi was right. These were quality tomatoes.

– – – 

Zuko was getting lonely, a feeling to which he was supposed to be accustomed. But it was much harder having something taken away than never having it in the first place. It became far too obvious how much he depended on his friends to help keep him in good spirits.

The first couple days after they left hadn't been so bad – Zuko was almost grateful for the silence around the palace. He was finally able to clean his room, having told the servants that he really didn't want their help. Still, they cleaned the floors. He knew it was their job, but that still made him uncomfortable. At some point, he had stopped thinking of them as his servants and more as his people, his comrades.

After that, well. Zuko wandered the halls trying his hardest not to think about his mom and Azula, wherever they may be. He could almost hear their laughter and singing. He turned the corner to the gardens and sped up. It wouldn't do to be late to feeding the turtleducks, which was a reasonable and normal thing for the turtleducks to think. Be that as it may, it was one of the few places in the palace that he still felt safe, even after all these years. After all, his father, or Ozai, he corrected himself, had never come in here, thinking sitting by the pond far too useless an activity.

Laying here with his eyes half-closed, he didn’t hear Mai standing in the doorway until she spoke, voice small but carrying as always. “Zuzu. Fancy seeing you here.”

He got up with a start. “Mai. Long time.”

“Not long enough, if you ask me,” but she was smiling and Zuko took that as a win. 

“What’re you doing here?”

Mai shrugged and went to lean against her tree. “I’m waiting for Ty Lee.” That wasn’t the answer he wanted, and she knew it, but he knew better than to prod. Mai glanced at him, eyes searching for something. “Why are you here?”

“I live here,” he replied dumbly.

Mai raised an eyebrow.

“Also, I got tired and missed my friends.” He paused. “What happened to Azula?”

“Funny that you care now, a year after you last saw her.”

Zuko looked away. 

“Anyway, I'm not here for that.”

They sat in silence for a bit longer, but the ducks had stopped quacking and had retreated to the back of the pond.

Zuko took a chance. “I guess I’ve been missing what used to be more than I realized and being back home just exacerbated that. I miss what Azula, and I had with Mother.”

“You miss what you had with your mother.”

Zuko was taken aback. “What do you mean?”

Mai stared. “You didn’t know?”

“Know what?”

She sighed. “The reason you remember your mom so fondly is that... she never liked Azula.”

Zuko stared.

“Think. Do you remember a time when she was both with you and her? After she was a baby?”

Zuko thought. “I -”

Mai sighed again, deeper this time. “Oh, Zuko. I wish it weren’t this way, but it is. Your mother loved you and Azula, sure. But she truly liked you, and not her.”

Zuko couldn't help but stare.

“Hey, guys!” Ty Lee’s voice rang out uncomfortably loud across the compound. “How are you, Zuzu? Long time!”

“I -” Zuko gulped, head starting to hurt. “I should go. Let me know if you two need anything,” he said awkwardly as he ran away.

– – –


End file.
